Peter A. Testori, EdD, is Dean, Academic Resources & Title IX Coordinator
“My coming out story starts in high school. I was junior when I began coming to terms with my sexuality. At first, I put my head in the sand, but this action soon affected me in other ways. Although I was a straight “A” student, my grades began to slip. And then I failed a Spanish test. That was it. I literally withdrew from school, got into my car and drove off. The school provided me with a tutor, and in the meantime I worked at the Big Y supermarket. One day, when no one was home, I looked into the mirror and said, ‘Peter you are gay.’ This was a huge moment because I came out to myself. Once I admitted who I was, I decided to tell my parents. But first, in case things didn’t work out, I packed my clothes in a grocery bag. If they didn’t accept me, I would go to my grandmother’s house. When I told my mother, all she said was, ‘…is this what this is all about? You put us through this because you are gay? Who cares??’ Even my dad, whose reaction I was concerned about, suspected I was gay. I re-enrolled in school and eventually received a full-tuition scholarship as part of the Honors Program at Eastern Connecticut State University. My advice, which I also try to impart to students, is that it is better to be the person you are, rather than show the person you aren’t. When I came out, I was so much more comfortable around people. And that day when my life changed—December 11, 1997—I celebrate it every year. I like to say it is the day I was found.”